The Temerarious Bag By: Apurva Desai
The bag travels the world like a soldier in rain,
The bag travels the world with his shoulders in pain,
Some people say he's been driven madly insane.
Oh! How he loved the world!
He was very shy and stayed at home,
Now he's like Tarzan in a big jungle dome. OOO! OOO! OOO!
Oh! How he loved the world!
The bag is lightning waiting to strike,
The bag tries stunts on his big blue bike!
Oh! How he loved the world!
He'll do any thing that he hasn't done yet,
he'll bathe with piranhas for a small little bet.
Oh! How he loved the world!
He's not afraid to go try out new things,
He'll come and eat up yummy alligator wings.
Oh! How he loved the world!
The bag will not regret anything he did
He'll just say " Hey I ate that ginormous squid!"
Oh! How he loved the world!
Dear Apruva
ReplyDeleteI really liked how u rhymed and how u described the bag
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ReplyDeleteDear Apurva
ReplyDeleteThis is a wonderful poem. I really liked how you rhymed in some paragraphs
Tommy
dear apurva
ReplyDeletereally great poem, great job at rhymed
from louis
Dear Apurva,
ReplyDeleteYour stroy was touching! The way you described your bag was amazing, the tone, and theme are all good!
Kaitlyn
Dear Apurva,
ReplyDeleteVery nice poem, it takes alot of work to make it rhyme like that, and superb figurative language, very good.
dear Apurva
ReplyDeletethis poem is putting me into it it is very beautiful
Dear Apurva
ReplyDeleteI like your poem and the fact is that you poem is very good
Dear Apurva,
ReplyDeleteI think your poem is amazing because of the rhyming scheme, and because of how you spin metaphors.
Personally, i think your poem is also hilarious because of the rhymes in some paragraphs. I really like the rhyme:
"He's not afraid to go try out new things,
He'll come and eat up yummy alligator wings."
Amazing Poem,
Alon Haas
Dear Apurva,
ReplyDeleteReally the only thing I must say is that this poem is one of the most professionally written poems I have ever read, the rhyming is amazing. The last three paragraphs are so cool too. Save this poem because one day you can be famous for this!!!
Best Regards,
Karim El-Khazindar
Dear Apurva,
ReplyDeleteWhen I read the poem I got the message that we should all live life to the maximum. When I listened to the music,"live life like you were dying" the words popped out even more. This poem has such light-hearted happy tone. A massive message to all people who dwell in a negative world. Life is just so much fun isn't it.
A very well written poem . Excellent connection with the audience. Thanks for brightening up my evening.Bravo :-)
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ReplyDeleteDear Apurva,
ReplyDeleteThat was an awesome poem with all the rhyming.
My favorite rhyme was : Hey I ate a ginormous squid.
It was a amazing and you would think that at first there
were going to be a lot of metaphors but no they were
about an adventurous bag. The sing was perfect
fit with your poem!
Awesome poem!
Dear Apurva, Such a strong poem. Such a fine title with a word that I had to look up to know the meaning of. The title makes me want to understand you poem. Kindly Dorrit (Conrad's mother)
ReplyDelete